If living on the Isle of Wight is not remote enough for you, why not bid on one (or both?) of two Victorian forts in the middle of the Solent, when they go under the hammer next month?
Spitbank Fort, between the Isle of Wight and Portsmouth, is among the lots listed in a Savills property auction, which will take place on June 18.
The unique property, which was previously a hotel, offers nine guest suites, staff accommodation and event spaces across 33,000 sq. ft, over three floors.
Highlights include a restaurant with 60 covers, a wine cave and a roof terrace.
The atrium, inside No Man's Land Fort (Image: PA)
If relaxation is top of your list, the fort has a hot pool, sauna, fire pit and sun decks.
You are unlikely to be disturbed in your isolation - the walls are granite and 15ft thick.
The fort has a self-contained well, generators and its own sewage treatment plant
Listed for £1,000,000, it is described as 'an unparalleled opportunity...nestled in the waters of Portsmouth Harbour'.
"This remarkable property offers a truly one-of-a-kind living experience...historic charm harmonizes with modern amenities.
"Enjoy panoramic views and exclusive privacy," read the property details.
Three forts were built in the Solent, around 1860, by Prime Minister Lord Palmerston when the country feared invasion by the French.
By the time they had been completed, the threat had passed and they became known as Palmerston’s Follies.
No Man's Land Fort - a perfect place to watch the boats go by (Image: PA)
Also up for sale is No Man's Land Fort, which is also listed at £1,000,000.
It boasts around 99,000 sq. ft of space, over four floors, as well as 23 en-suite bedrooms, crew quarters, multiple bars and restaurants and a number of multi-purpose rooms.
It is being sold as a ready made venue or hotel, with scope for conversion.
Transportation to your new home, two miles south of Portsmouth, is easy - there is a helipad.
Robin Howeson, head of Savills Auctions, said: “I’ve seen several sea forts hit the market that have achieved impressive prices, as buyers have sought to pursue these trophy assets.
"Having been carefully restored by the current owners, No Man’s and Spitbank Fort represent exceptional market value.
"I anticipate there to be a global interest from multiple buyer types.”
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